Goats Have No Reverse

Goats have no reverse. Seriously. I have two of them here on my homestead, neutered bucks named Sato and Yo, and while they are geniuses at escaping any type of enclosure, they are total morons when it comes to their leads. In the morning, they are excited and happy to be out of their pen (Actually, I am pretty sure they spend most of the night out carousing, just slipping back in at daybreak, like a certain teenager I once was). They are so excited and happy that they immediately wrap their leads around my legs, and continue to spiral ever tighter. And the dog doesn't help, alternately jumping over and ducking under their ropes. So I have to push their heads in a vain attempt to make them back up. Nope. That won't happen. They are bigger than Great Danes with a heck of a lot more traction. So I have to unwind the leads, wondering how goats managed to tie a clove hitch around my knees. Now I am able to move another ten or twenty meters before they find a nice cane of bamboo. Sato goes clockwise, the Yo counterclockwise. Round and round like a flipping maypole. The dog jumps up and down like some sort of spring loaded mud caked pogo stick. I am tempted to just leave them there, but again I untangle their leads and finally get them to their tether in the meadow. Finally the dog and I can get the walk done. Whew.